Planning to leave an abusive relationship

Direct assault on the body (choking, shaking, eye injuries, biting, slapping, pushing, spitting, burning, punching or kicking) ​

Use of weapons including objects ​

Assaulting the children/ pets​

Locking the victim in or out of the house or rooms ​

Forcing the victim to take drugs ​

Withholding medication, food or medical care 

Swearing and continual humiliation, in private or in public ​

Attacks on your intelligence, ability, sexuality, body image and capacity as a parent and spouse

Forbidding or controlling access to bank accounts ​

Providing only a small ‘allowance’ ​

Not allowing the victim to have a job or jeopardising their current job​

Forcing the victim to sign documents or make financial decisions under pressure ​

Forcing the victim to spend their wages on the household expenses – so that there is no spare money left over for social / personal items​

Controlling the victim’s income ​

Denying the entitlements to property ​

Blaming the victim for the problems in the relationship ​

Constantly comparing the victim with others to undermine their​ self-esteem and self-worth​

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Withdrawing all interest and engagement (e.g. weeks of silent treatment) ​

Emotional blackmail and suicidal threats​

Making you feel like you are to blame for things that you had nothing to do with

Making you feel like you are going "crazy" - this is often referred to as "Gaslighting"

Stalking and intimidating you, or your family/friends,  text harassment, constant phone calls, showing up unannounced and threatening or intimidating you

Isolation from family and friends such as ongoing rudeness to or about family and friends to alienate them, or limiting contact with family and friends ​

Instigating and controlling the move to a location where the victim has no established social circle or work opportunities ​

Restricting use of the car, telephone, internet or finances ​

Forbidding or physically preventing the victim from going out and meeting people ​

There has been a huge increase in Social media abuse or technology facilitated abuse in the past few years.

Technology-facilitated abuse is when someone harasses, threatens, monitors or impersonates another person continually using technology. 

This type of abuse can occur between strangers, but most often occurs alongside other types of abuse in domestic and family violence 

For more information on how to keep your self tech safe visit:

 https://www.esafety.gov.au/women 

Any form of pressured/unwanted sex, regardless of you being in a relationship - 

Forced sex without protection against pregnancy or sexually transmitted disease ​

Making the victim perform sexual acts unwillingly (including taking or distributing explicit photos without their consent) ​

Criticising or using sexually degrading insults 

Distributing or threatening to distribute explicit photos of you

Stalking involves a pattern of strange or suspicious incidents. To control, intimidate and create fear in a person, a stalker may:

• make repeated phone calls
• send numerous text messages
• loiter outside or near a person’s home or work
• leave messages on social networking sites, such as Facebook
• leave notes on a your car
• leave flowers at a your residence
• follow or continually stare at you -they are stalking
• monitor your use of technology, including phone, email and other communications.

Stalking happens when a person intentionally and persistently pursues someone against their will. 

The stalker does this to control, intimidate and create fear in the person they are stalking. The person being stalked may feel like they are in danger.

Stalking limits a person’s freedom and makes them feel they have lost control over their lives. Some people who have been stalked are forced to change their lives, including by moving house and changing jobs.

Anyone can be a victim of stalking. 

Perpetrators include current or former partners, relatives and strangers. 

In Australia, stalking is a crime.

Spiritual abuse is the denial or use of spiritual or religious beliefs and practices to control and dominate a person. 

Spiritual abuse can impact on a someone’s self-esteem and confidence, make them feel guilty, damage their spiritual experiences and isolate them. 

Forcing you to attend a church or have certain beliefs that are not in line with your own thoughts or beliefs.

Forcing you to act in accordance with their beliefs or against your beliefs, this can be in regard to:

• contraception methods
• the way you are allowed to dress
• which schools your children attend 
• social groups you are allowed to associate with

Preventing you from practising their religion

misusing spiritual or religious beliefs and practices to justify other types of abuse and violence

Accusing you of being too religious or not religious enough

Ridiculing your understanding of religious practices or beliefs.

Restricting or denying a woman’s ability to make her own decisions about her body is an attempt to maintain power and control over a woman.  

Behaviour that has the intention of controlling a woman’s reproductive health decision-making is known as reproductive abuse.

Reproductive abuse generally falls into one of the below categories, though is not limited to:

• Forcing or manipulating a woman into becoming pregnant or not giving her an option to have children
• Prevent a woman from using contraception, or tampering with contraception
• Forcing a woman to continue or terminate a pregnancy.

Reproductive abuse can occur in any of the following ways:

• Destroying, hiding or sabotaging birth control pills or condoms
• Controlling finances to restrict your access to birth control
• Insisting on unprotected sex
• Verbal pressure, threats or blackmail to influence reproductive choices
• Pregnancy pressure- e.g a man accusing a woman of not wanting to be pregnant because she doesn’t love him or because she wants to continue alleged affairs
• Pressuring a woman to continue a pregnancy
• Pressuring a woman to end a pregnancy
• Rape
• Miscarriage as a result of physical assault